Sunday, August 28, 2011

It must be two weeks pre-race... Anxiety Dreams!

I can't speak for everyone else, but I get anxiety dreams.  With two weeks to go to race day, they are here in full force. Interestingly, a number of tri teammates makes cameos in these dreams.  Usually, they are going way faster than me, but they are so far, quite supportive.  I suppose this is a good thing, meaning that my subconscious looks to my teammates for moral support.  I might need to chat with my subconscious about the roles that M is playing in these dreams, though...

Last night, I dreamed that I swam the swim backwards and got caught by the officials who took me out of the water and made me swim the swim normally.  Mrs. Fearless Leader was among the rescue kayakers, except they'd tied a wakeboard to her feet.  She'd swim to the ailing swimmers and tow them to shore.  No tow for me, however.  When I tried to get hold of the wakeboard, I was instructed that I had better swim!

Sadly, in the dream, I'd forgotten how to swim and could only doggie paddle.

Finally I came out of the water... in 1:30.  This is ridiculously long for an Olympic distance, and in dream land, put me in danger of the cut-off time.  I could see everyone else running, and I knew I'd be the very last person to the bike.  I ran to transition, where all the other athletes had already removed their bikes.  Someone had moved my stuff, though, so I had to grab the bag of my things and my towel and mat and hobble it over to my bike.

Except that there was no M.  M is my special needs person, designated to give me my cochlear processor.  In the dream, no M.  No processor.  Finally, I found him, taking pictures of flowers and artistic grass blades.

(This is why I might need to chat with my subconscious... why is it so worried that M, who is generally reliable and extremely supportive, will fail me in my hour of need?  He hasn't ever let me down for important things: wedding = on time.  Pick up from airports = on time.  Last year, getting to Nation's and forgetting to bring the backpack with my dry clothes for after the race on the rainiest day of September = the man hailed a freakin' taxi in the District of Columbia where it is technically illegal to hail taxis and hauled ass back to the hotel to get the backpack and STILL DIDN'T MISS THE RACE START = super on time.  Really, subconscious.  Chill.)  

The dream ended with me screaming something along the lines of "Get into transition, now!  I have to bike!  I have to get on the bike now!  I have to!  I have to bike now!"

On the bright side, this sort of thing just motivates me to make yet another checklist.  So far, I have four: pack for race, overall (everything I'll need to pack for DC); pack for swim; pack for bike; pack for run; (those three are race day checklists) and finally, pack for race day (transition bag) and pack for race day (M's bag).

For the ADHD control freak in your life (like me!), this is part of what makes triathlon AWESOME.

Control-freak obsessive checklists?

Yes, check.  Thank you.

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