Instead, I've been granted cats. M and I adopted two of them. Now, they are very nice cats. They have little purring motors inside their tummies. They are pretty good looking and don't claw furniture. They just wrestle with each other a little.
But today I arrived home to find a little hole in one of my shopping bags, which I had used to stash a change of shoes in this messy, salty weather. And what did I find next to it... but Snowbeast, gnawing away on the shoe?
Luckily I retrieved it before he had done any serious damage, but really, SNOWBEAST, you are a CAT! Why the heck are you chewing shoes for? Whoever heard of a shoe-chewing cat?